BREAKING POINT

She felt stupid. And sad. And angry.

But if something good had come from her involvement with Jeremy, it was Howard. She had little Howard. She would focus on him. She would love him and he would love her back. No matter what happened, she refused to see her baby as anything but a blessing.

He was such a wonderful, cute little baby. He didn’t cry much except when he was hungry…. Or needed his diaper changed. He would frown and pout before crying loudly, but as soon as he got what he needed, he was a happy baby again.

Penny didn’t talk much to anyone when she returned to Cornwell. Audrey of course, was delighted that she had returned so soon, Joey was too.

But the happiness wasn’t complete because they knew that if Penny was back so early and without Jeremy, then it meant that things didn’t go as planned with Jeremy.

Penny stayed indoors for days. She wasn’t in the mood to take those long, delightful walks with Joey anymore, so she just spent most of her time in her room or in the garden. Even when Jeremy tried to keep her company, he knew that her thoughts were far away… That she had been deeply hurt and it would take time before she would be her former self again. She didn’t even sketch anymore, but Audrey noticed how she lit up a little when ever she was with her son, but she also noticed how she would fall back into her depressed state after a while.

Audrey was terribly upset to see her best friend hurting like this, but she didn’t know what to do. Penny shut everyone out and refused to talk about Jeremy.

Audrey felt bad for her brother. The whole thing was just awful. Joey was confused too. He loved Penny. All he had ever wanted to do was to protect her, but he couldn’t. There was nothing he could do and knowing that he could do nothing to help her upset him so much.

He wanted to hurt Jeremy. He wanted to hurt Jeremy badly for putting such a sweet human as Penny through all this. How could anyone not want her? How could anyone not want Howard? Little, chubby, sweet Howard.

“Do you think Penny is going to be alright?” he asked Audrey one evening as they sat in the living room. Penny was in her room… Where she always seemed to be lately.

Audrey sighed deeply. “Yes. I know she will be alright in the end. Penny is a very sensitive, emotional creature but she’s also strong and determined. She will be fine, but I’m not just sure how long it will be. That’s what worries me. I don’t like to see her this way and we can’t let her go on like this for too long”

Joey looked at his fingers and rubbed them together nervously. “I hate seeing her like this too. I want to help her, but I have no idea how to. I’m not even sure she would even want to listen to me”

“Let’s give her sometime” Audrey replied. “I understand what she’s going through. I went through almost the same thing with Alex, remember? If we see no improvement, then I will have to talk to her, even if she doesn’t want to. At some point she will have to talk about it, it helps the healing process.” She paused for a moment and added. “As for that Jeremy, I hate him for hurting my friend so much but I can’t help but feel…. Relief… On Penny’s behalf.

Joey lifted his head and gave his sister a look.

“Oh don’t look at me like that” Audrey said. “You know you’re thinking the same thing, but your damn good nature won’t let you admit it to yourself. It’s okay to be selfish sometimes, Joey. It’s okay to want something good for yourself. The truth is that Jeremy was bad for Penny, and you know it. You two belong together, and it’s a good thing she found out what kind of person he was. It would have been terrible if they’d gotten married. But it’s a good thing that you’re here. Penny needs you, and hopefully when she’s finally over this, she will be able to see what a great match you two make. She should be with you. You agree with me, don’t you?”

“I don’t want to rush her into anything” said Joey, “Especially now, after what she has been through, I don’t even know if she will ever give me a chance. That aside, you are right. Penny needs me, she needs her friends, and I’m going to be there for her in any way that I can”

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A week later, Audrey stepped into Penny’s room where she stood folding up clothes. Howard lay asleep in his cot.

“He’s finally asleep” she whispered.

Penny nodded “Yes” she replied, keeping her voice low too to avoid waking Howard. “He’s been crying a lot today. I’m kinda getting worried. Am I over reacting?”

“Oh I’m sure he’s fine. He’s a healthy baby. Babies cry. It’s kinda what they do. But If he continues tomorrow then we will have the doctor check him out at the hospital just to be sure”

“Yes. Good idea” Penny agreed, and went back to folding the clothes.

Audrey took a seat, and in her calm soothing voice asked, “How are you Penny?”

Penny gave her a weird look. “I’m fine. We have seen each other like Fifty times today. Why did you ask me that?”

Audrey tapped her fingers on the table. “Definitely not Fifty times. There’s no need to exaggerate. I haven’t talked to you about.. You know… The break up…. since you returned because I didn’t want to push you when you weren’t ready to open up. I know that you have been through a lot lately, and I just want to make sure that you are okay”

Penny began to fold the clothes a little faster and pushed them into the drawer with more force than necessary

“Oh, you mean about Jeremy?” she said, “Well, I’m over that now…. Obviously.”

“Are you?” Audrey cut in.

“Yes. Do I have a choice? I have to be okay with it. I mean, it was my decision to be with Jeremy. He was a terrible, horrible person and you saw it. Everyone did except me. I ignored all the bad signs. I built him all up in my head. I was going to marry him…. I have no one to blame for my actions but myself so I have to be fine with the outcome… And I am. I’m fine Audrey” Penny concluded.