Chapter 126
ROSIE
WHEN my friend molly left for london all those years ago, it had felt like she’d taken my fun of studying along with her. Goodbye, for ever. But I had hope now. I had excitement about having someone new in my life here, outside of the vague circle I’d been on the outskirts of.
Instead of heading for the college gates at the end of my lessons, I took a detour to the art block.
I hardly knew my way around it, so I sat myself down on a bench by the main design block exit doors, keeping an eye on the students as they walked on by. Lola was one of the last, walking alone. She was rummaging in her satchel as she approached. She didn’t see me until I called out a hey with a smile on my face. Her smile back in return was such a relief that I leapt up from the bench, slinging my backpack on to join her on the path.
“Wasn’t expecting to see you here,” she said. “Whoa, seriously. Thanks for coming.”
That was one of the traits we must have shared, saying thank you for everything in the world, even when it wasn’t needed. She didn’t need to say thank you for me wanting to hang out with her. We walked in silence until we reached the gates, smiling at each other in that unspoken way that friends do. We waited until everyone else had passed us by before we sat on the wall at the side of the college.
“You coming up to me in the library meant a lot,” I told her. “I was so excited when I told Julian I met you. Feels like kindred spirits, a bit.”
“Tell me about it. I’ve needed one. I was crapping myself when I found you in the library, thinking you might just tell me to fuck off, but you didn’t. I told Peter all about it over dinner. He thought it was epic. We’ve both been lonely, you know? Both me and him this past year. I guess that’s normal when you’re kicked out of your whole community.” She looked at me. “Did Julian leave his family for you?”
“No, no. He left and moved across from Oxford. We’ll, actually, that’s not true. He got thrown out. They caught him cheating, except he wasn’t cheating, not really. Things with his wife were over, even though they weren’t technically. It’s complicated. Still feels weird to think he has a family out there. He always seemed to be just a guy upstairs on his own that people said to stay away from.”
I knew I was rambling, so I took a breath, cheeks burning, well aware I was spilling a lot of info to a stranger. She didn’t judge me or him, though, just nodded along.
“Peter’s past is complicated, too. It was a hard choice for him, but his wife didn’t even like him anymore. She used to dump dinner in front of him along with the kids’, and as soon as they were in bed she’d just ignore him, chatting to her friends on the phone. She went out every weekend. He’s pretty sure she was cheating. It’s one of those things I guess, though. They found out about me, and he was suddenly a piece of shit because I’m younger. They said he must have been grooming, which was bullshit. I’d been into him for years.”
“Were you the first person he fucked outside of his marriage?”
“There was one other woman, down the street,” Lola said. “Lasted a few months, but he didn’t like her like her. It was casual. It’s another load of ammo for people. Serial womaniser. He’ll fuck you over.”
“You trust him though, right?”
“Yeah, I trust him, completely. How about you? Do you trust Julian?”
“I trust him one hundred percent.”
“Cool.” She turned towards me. “So, how old is he? People say the age gap is huge.”
I didn’t flinch. “Forty-eight.”
Even she rose her eyebrows, but she didn’t frown.
“Yep,” I said. “Thirty years between us.”
“Plenty old enough for him to know his own mind, then. That’s the way I see it. Unless he’s an absolute total liar, feeding you a whole load of total and utter bullshit, he must be pretty damn sure you’re the one.”
I hadn’t seen it quite like that. “He’s definitely not feeding me bullshit. I know that.”
“You feel it, right? I’m like that with Peter. He goes crazy for me. Not just in the bedroom, but everywhere. It’s better than anything else I’ve ever seen in other couples. Most people always seem to be whining about the person they’re with, or their relationships are full of drama or shit, you know?”
Yeah, I did know.
She laughed. “If anything, it’s the other way around. It’s us people should be worried about fucking them over. We’re the ones more likely to change our minds. Or you’d think so, based on their logic, since we’re so immature.”Exclusive content © by Nô(v)el/Dr/ama.Org.
Another good point.
“I can’t see me changing my mind on Julian. Not ever.”
“Me, neither. Me and Peter are for ever.”
I looked at her fresh, feeling the friendship, wanting to know her.
Her hair was in the same kind of braid as yesterday, but the ribbon was green this time. It caught the light so well, she looked like a mermaid. She was dressed in a turquoise mini dress, with big black boots on her feet.
Cute. Somehow I doubted she had Peter’s Slut written on her in marker pen, but who was I to make that call? She could have his name tattooed all over her pussy for all I knew.
She took out a pack of cigarettes from her satchel and offered me one, but I turned her down with a thanks. I watched her light up, then opted for a pretty hardcore question.
“What is it about Peter that makes him the one?”
She didn’t hesitate.
“A million things. He’s really creative, but he doesn’t think so. He went into scaffolding work along with his dad when he was a teenager, and that hasn’t ever changed. He seems to think that because he’s not Picasso, there’s no point in trying. I think he’d be a brilliant artist, actually, if he gave himself the chance. He’s great at pointing out stuff when I’m working on mine, and his colour skills are crazy good. I just wish he’d give himself the chance and believed in himself as much as he believes in me. Maybe one day.” She looked at me. “What’s Julian like? I heard the rumours that he’s posh.”
“He’s posh, yeah. Looks amazing in a suit. He was a university professor, before he left Oxford.”
“What subject did he teach?”
“English,” I tapped into her creativity thread. “Years ago, he wanted to be an author. He’s amazing, too. Seriously. I’ve read some of his old manuscripts.”
“That must be fun. Maybe he’ll show me some of his words, if I show him some of my art?”
That made my heart soar. I’d love to see his face as someone else applauded him, because they would. He could create whole worlds at his fingertips, and they were so vivid, so real, so… awesome.
“Fancy coming over to ours sometime? Julian suggested it, actually. He’s a great chef, cooks an amazing meal. It would be great to hang out. I’d love to meet Peter, too.”
“Really?” She grinned so bright. “Sounds good to me. Might be a stepping stone to hitting the great outdoors. Imagine that. We could be out partying together before you know it. That would be dream worthy.”
The idea made me so happy. Friends.
“I’d love to see your art, too,” I said. “I noticed your backdrop on your laptop yesterday. You did that?”
“Yeah, I did. Can’t wait to get qualified and have more of an outlet. Hopefully. Roll on summer.”
She was in the same year as me. My exams and qualifications were looming. But I hadn’t thought about that, yet. I hadn’t really ever considered it. I’d never figured it was likely I’d be leaving Mum behind, my attention was usually all on her.