Panic Attack
S POV
I was still brooding over what Catherine did to Brianna and how she had walked out on me when Amelia and some of the other maids barged into my room to inform me that Brianna had collapsed.
Seeing her like that, unconscious, almost breathless with her skin as pale as freshly fallen snow made fear and panic riot inside me. I had never been afraid like that for a long time. The only time that happened was when my parents died.
First, it was my dad. He died of a chronic cardiovascular disease. It happened a few months after my marriage to Catherine. I was there, holding his hand tight, hot tears steaming my vision as he said his last words on his deathbed before giving up the ghost. I broke down to the extent that I found it hard to eat amd think clearly for days, the scenario replaying like a horror movie in my head. Catherine had to invite my mum to come over and intervene. If not I would have died of sorrow and starvation.
A few weeks later, while I was having breakfast, I received an urgent call from my mum’s maid. She was crying throughout the phone conversation I could barely understand a word she said. The little I had managed to grab was that my mother had passed away in her sleep. That news alone made my heart to stop beating for a moment. For weeks, I struggled to process the information. And when it dawned on me that she was gone forever. That she and Dad were no more. That I was now alone, I struggled to accept the reality.
I mustered the fortitude to bear their loss, memories of her and father’s laughter, their childish giggles in the garden, their wisdom, and the warmth of their embrace flooded my mind, gently wiping the sorrow away.
Sometimes in my dream, I see them still giggling and playing around like kids in that garden. I see them digging the moist earth and sowing seeds inside. That was one of the major reasons that the garden held a special place in my heart. It reminded me of them.
When I saw Brianna in that unconscious state, that past feeling came clawing back into me like talons. I thought I had failed her. Failed to protect her as I promised. Failed to bring an end to her pain. Her past suffering. I thought I had lost her.
When I asked the maids what happened, Amelia told me she did complain to her about a headache earlier that morning. What sent my temper flaring was when she told me Catherine had hit her on the side of her face with her purse. And that was what might have triggered the headache even more and caused her to collapse and lose consciousness.
After I had called a doctor to check up on her, he told me the headache was a result of stress and overworking. If it had stayed a little longer, it could have grown into a migraine. And that would have been much worse. He advised me to make sure she had enough bed rest, ate well, took the medication he prescribed for her and most importantly avoided any activity that could lead to stress.
With what the doctor said, I lashed out at the other maids, especially the head maid. I had made it very clear to her the first day Brianna arrived that she shouldn’t let her do much work in the castle. She apologized and promised to make things right. But she said she never knew she was working so hard in the castle to my surprise. It only made me wonder why she was working so hard? And who was making her work that hard.
When her beautiful crystal eyes fluttered open after more than six hours of unconsciousness, I was happy and breathed out in huge relief.© 2024 Nôv/el/Dram/a.Org.
I had tried to help her up. But she blazed at me and afterwards broke down in tears. Seeing her like that drew out the protective instinct in me. It made me feel like a dagger was driven deep into my soul and left there. It made me feel a rage that I tried so hard to suppress, coursing through my veins. It made me feel like I was…failing her. And it struck me even harder to know it was all because of Catherine. She was pushing me to the wall. And I might just lose it.
Hoping to calm that storm of emotions surging in her, I tucked myself beside her on the bed and pulled her into my embrace. I wanted to make her feel comfortable. Safe. Make her know she wasn’t alone. That I’ll always be with her. I expected her to scream at me like she did and push me away. But to my surprise, she accepted me, tightened her delicate arms around me and sought shelter in me, making me feel needed. Like I was her hero.
But when the door swung open and Catherine’s horrified face came into view, I knew I was in another trouble. But above all, I knew I had to make things right once and for all.
“What the fuck?!” She stared at us in horror, her nostrils flaring and her mouth falling open. “How could you do this to me, Sebastian?”
“It’s not what you think Catherine,” I slid my hands from Brianna and jolted from the bed.
Scoffing out a fume, she glared at me and walked away.
“Just stay put, okay?” I said to Brianna as I made my way to the door. She was stricken with panic and was raking her hair to a mess with her fingers. “I’ll talk to her. Don’t worry and make sure not to stress yourself any further. I’ll be back before you know it.”
Jogging down the hallway, I saw Catherine making her way into our room. By the time I made it to our room, she was already standing by the bed, her arms crossed, blue eyes twinkling with anger as she continued tapping her heel impatiently against the floor.
“Look Catherine,” I approached with caution, trying to calm her. “It’s not what you think. I was only—”
“You lying son of a bitch!” she shot at me, cutting me off as she came closer. “You were only what? Let me guess, she had an accident. An injury you were checking out? I struggled so fucking hard to forget you took her to that cocktail party. Struggled to forget you tried to kiss her that night. But now you’ve gone too far. How can you stoop so low? Sleeping with that dirty bitch?!!”
“If you can just shut the hell up for once in your life and listen to me!” I vented, meeting her furious gaze. “While you were out there partying and having fun, I was here saving her life. She had a terrible headache and you fucking made it worse by hitting her on the head with your purse. She was unconscious for more than six hours. Six fucking hours!! I was so scared she won’t make it I had to call the doctor. She was so broken and hurt with how you’ve been treating her lately that she couldn’t even sit up on her own. So before you stand here and accuse me of something I’m innocent of, shut the hell up!! And listen to what I have to say first.”
Retracing her steps, her gaze broke away from mine. She turned cold all of a sudden, thrills of fright spreading through her body.
“Catherine,” I muttered as I walked closer to her, caught off-guard by the sudden change in her reaction. She looked like she’d seen a ghost. “Are you okay?… Is something wrong?”
Suddenly, her breathing became heavy and unsteady. She started to gasp, choking on her breath, her gasps so loud it echoed on the walls of the room.
Fuck!! My eyes widened in shock. She was having a panic attack.
She clung to the edge of an armchair, her body turning weak as she fought to keep herself upright. Beads of sweat popped from her forehead, evidence of her struggle for breath.
Her legs buckled beneath her and just as she was about to crumple to the floor, I rushed to her and caught her in my arms.