106 Truths and Lies Part 1
106 Truths and Lies Part 1
~Leo~
Tamia's call brought back painful memories, and I soon found myself walking on the street where the hotel was. I couldn't go back to my room. I couldn't see Amanda.
I was blind and weak. I was stupid and gullible. I helped Ramsey mess up my home.
All I had to do that night was reject her. I shouldn't have gone to talk to her. It was true when they said we should always tame our wolves and not let them drive or direct our actions.
My life was a mess because I allowed Black to control me. I lost a great woman and companion because of a stupid bond.
Hearing that Sylvester and Tamia were now fated broke my heart completely.
Maybe if I had rejected Amanda and Tamia rejected Devin, we might have been fated. The goddess had already blessed our union under a blue moon. Why did my wolf destroy everything? I walked, tears streaming down my face.
I had never cried so much in my life, but this year had been hell for me. I had cried so much this year that tears had become normal. They fell easily, and I did not fight them. Everyone knew I was a wreck, and there was no hiding it.
I could not believe Amanda had the effrontery to see Tamia and make requests.
I have to commend Tamia for her self-control.
I doubted I would have honoured her request if I were in Tamia's shoes. Tamia and I had a great life, and Amanda helped her father ruin it.
Not because she loved me or wanted to be with me but because her father wanted to take the east from me.
I walked and thought of everything. From when Ramsey began to clamour about me taking advantage of his daughter. Never for once did she come out and confess it wasn't true. Tamia might have asked me not to alert her, but I was done playing nice with Amanda.
I did not care if she was carrying my pups. I knew she wouldn't have tried this with the likes of Devin or Sylvester. I must have come across as a weak man to everyone for them to use me like this. The fact that I loved peace did not make me weak.
"I don't want her anymore," I heard Black say in my mind. I could feel his anger. No one would be happy learning we were pawns, and a means to an end.
"Tamia would never use us. Amanda destroyed us," Black said, and I could understand his pain.
"You should have ignored Amanda's wolf's call, but you didn't. You left Tamia's side and went into Amanda's room to claim her. You put us in this mess, Black," I told my wolf angrily because he had betrayed me the most.
"I am sorry," He whimpered in my head.
"Sorry won't fix it, Black. Sorry won't change things. It won't bring her back to us," I told my wolf, and we were both in pain.
"When you came to me, you promised you would protect me, be my strength, and never hurt or mislead me," I reminded my wolf.
"Tamia was in my life before you, Black. You have always been a part of me from birth, but you came to my consciousness when I was eighteen. Tamia was my friend before then, and we had each other's backs.
"You promised you would love what I love and protect it with everything, yet you betrayed her," I said. I felt Black's pain, so I had to sit. Material © NôvelDrama.Org.
"You threw her away for a feeling, a bond that we could do without. You gave our enemy an opening to torment us. You made us weak. Did you see what Sylvester did at the ball?" I said, feeling ashamed of myself.
"He had a history with that woman, so the pull would have been stronger than ours, yet he honoured his promise. His wolf honoured his choice. His wolf did not knock him out and do the unthinkable; his wolf allowed him to make a choice and accepted it," I said.
"You cheated me, Black. You knocked me out severally, battled me unceasingly, and kept trying to make it work by force. Every time I tried to touch my wife, you fought me. Every time I chose my wife, you fought me. You ruined me. You betrayed Tamia; you betrayed me, Black. If I could separate myself from you, I would in a heartbeat because you have done more harm than good," I said, and he was utterly silent.
"But I do not blame you, Black. You were like a child in a candy store. I shouldn't have given you free rein. I should have held on to control and stood my ground; I should have completed my sentence on the balcony and spoken the right words to break free from her. I should have ended it on the spot, but I let it fester and gave it room to overcome us. So I take the blame for everything," I said, and Black whimpered.
"We can't lose more than we already have. We cannot continue to let Ramsey run circles around us. I hope you know what we need to do?" I told my wolf, and he growled.
"We need to be the opposite of who we are; we need to be ruthless and unforgiving when dealing with the bastard. It means dealing with Amanda too, even though she is carrying our pups. As things are, that pregnancy seems more like a trap than a coincidence because, to be honest, we weren't ready," I told my wolf, and he growled some more.
"I do not want Amanda anymore; she has betrayed us," Black said firmly. I was determined to help him keep that resolve.
We returned to the room, and Amanda was awake in bed; her eyes were puffy, and she looked worried. I did not say a word to her. I went back under the covers and lay down. Amanda looked troubled and stared at me, still sitting in bed.
"Tamia is never coming back to you, Leo; you must move on. You can't keep punishing me like this. It isn't my fault that we are fated," She said to me, and I almost raised my hands at her because she had said the very words I said to my wife.
I sat up in bed feeling complete rage, and Black keeping his promise, receded to the back of my mind, promising not to interfere this time.
"But it is your fault that you came into my home and broke my marriage. It is your fault that you could not speak the truth to the alphas when your father lied that I had accepted you and taken advantage of you on the balcony. It is your fault that you sowed discord between Tamia and me by telling lies and pitting us against each other. It is your fault, Amanda," I said, and she shook her head, tears streaming down her cheeks.
"No, Leo, it is Volkov's fault that she is not in your life. He attacked the region and took her from you as tribute. Had he not attacked our region, she would have still been with you. You have an issue with him," she said, and I giggled. Knowing her father caused the incident that led to the attack made me giggle.
"You think Tamia and I wouldn't have defeated our attackers?" I asked her and laughed.
"She is a true Luna, a warrior. She might be a delta breed, but your alpha wolf has nothing on her, Amanda. Tamia and I have weathered storms and conquered packs together. We were a formidable force. I did not defeat your father alone, Amanda; Tamia was by my side. She fought, planned,
organised and did everything to ensure we got to the top and do you know why?" I asked her, and she shook her head.
"Your father killed her parents, and I promised I would disgrace him, and he knows, hence why he has been silent. Tamia and I dared to lead the east, and we did a good job at it, so do not think Volkov's warriors stood a chance against us because they didn't. Tamia left because of you," I said, and she bowed her head and began to cry.
"You wanted to be head Luna of the east so badly that you forgot to look up the requirements," I said to her, feeling thoroughly disgusted now that Black wasn't in the picture.
"She has forgiven everything and moved on. Why can't you?" she asked quietly, and I felt her wolf coming to the surface, calling onto Black.
Arla had a way of calling on Black when things got heated between Amanda and me, and this was one of those times. Still, Black was keeping his promise and remained unresponsive.
"Tamia can move on because she does not have to live in the same house or wake up next to you. To me, you represent everything that went wrong in my life, Amanda. I can never love you because you wrecked my home with lies. I do not know why your father would help you like this. Did he not love you enough to want you to have a man that is truly yours? Instead, he helped you force your way into my home to become my mistress, playing second fiddle to my wife. If I did not know him, I would say he did not father you," I said to her, and she looked at me, and tears streamed down her face profusely. Her eyes looked haunted, as if I had peeled a hidden scar.