The Luna Choosing Game

Chapter 0629

Elva held tightly onto her teddy bear. She looked down at it with sad eyes.

"I don't understand, Mommy," Elva said. "Why do we hate bears now...?"

I lowered myself down to her level. Holding her shoulders, I explained, "We don't hate bears, honey. But... they could be dangerous right now. They're all pretty grumpy about some things that happened a few years ago. Until that gets sorted out, we need to be extra careful."

Elva nodded, soaking in my words. Then she held out her bear toward me. "Do we report Mr. Fuzz Bear?"

My heart cracked down the middle. How could I possibly, properly explain this situation to Elva, a child? She couldn't see the difference between wolves and bears. To her, they were all her tea-party guests.

"No, Elva," I said, gently pushing Mr. Fuzz Bear back toward Elva. "Mr. Fuzz Bear is a bear we can trust. It's every other bear that we see that we must stay away from and report, okay?"

She didn't seem to understand, her face still scrunched up in confusion. But, she eventually nodded and pulled Mr. Fuzz Bear back into her arms. "Okay..." she said in a tiny voice.

Slowly, we walked back to our room. I hadn't told Elva yet that I would be leaving without her today. I knew she was going to be upset about it.

As I dressed in less flashy clothes for the adventure, Elva stood in the closet doorway and asked me, "Where you going, Mommy?"

"I just have to go out for a little while."

"What about the bears?"

"I'll be okay," I told her. "Nicholas will be there to protect me."

"Can I come?" Elva asked.

Absolutely not. I would endanger my own life, but I'd never put Elva at risk. "No, honey," I said. "Not today." "But Mommy-"

"I'll be fine," I said, "But it's too dangerous for little girls."

That was apparently the wrong thing to say. She scrunched up her nose in frustrated anger.

"If you can go, I can go too!" she said.

"No, Elva."

"Why?" she asked.

"I told you why," I said, though even I could admit that my reasoning wasn't very sound, at least from her perspective. If I could choose to endanger myself, shouldn't she be able to, too?

"Why, Mommy?" she demanded.Copyright Nôv/el/Dra/ma.Org.

A knock sounded at the door, abruptly ending the argument. Nicholas opened the door.

He was dressed casually too, a suggestion made by Julian. They didn't want to stand out as princes and candidates while we were beyond the palace walls.

Nicholas wore blue jeans and a polo shirt. It was odd to see him dressed so informally, although the jeans hugged his backside delightfully.

"Did I come at a bad time?" he asked.

"Nick-lass!" Elva said, stomping out into the main room. "Tell Mommy I can come!"

Nicholas's almost smile immediately fell. "I can't, princess, I'm sorry."

"But I want to go!"

*The answer is no, Elva."

Her bottom lip quivered, and watching Nicholas, I could see the moment his heart broke, having to deny her. He even placed a hand to his chest, as if that would help ease some of the pain that was burning there.

"We'll be back before you know it," Nicholas added, softening.

Elva shook her head. She was still mad.

"Can I have a hug goodbye?" Nicholas asked, holding open his arms.

Elva frowned, but ultimately gave in. She came forward and he wrapped her in the safety of his embrace. Slowly, he released her. Then she looked at me.

"Do I get a hug too?" I asked, stretching open my arms. She quickly raced to me, and I earned a hug as well." Thank you," I told her. "I love you," I said and kissed her cheek. In case the worst should happen, I didn't want to leave any room for doubt about how I felt about her.

She was my darling daughter now and forever, no matter how long or short my life. She would always be mine. Nicholas and I left Elva in the care of her nanny and stepped out into the hall. After bidding good day to the guards at the door, the two of us walked away from the room.

*Elva really wanted to come," I told him.

"I saw," Nicholas said. "It hurt, to turn her down. Even though I knew that was best for her."

I nodded. "I didn't want to frighten her. I don't want her to know fear at her age, but I also want Elva to be cautious. It's a difficult balancing act."

"I can see that."

"Especially when she doesn't understand why I am willing to risk my life, but she is not permitted to do the same," I said.

"I would prefer it if neither of you risked your lives," Nicholas said. "But Elva's safety is paramount." He shook his head a little. "I will do my best to bring you safely back to her. I hate that anyone has to be at risk."

*I fear that we might always be in some level of danger," I said, slipping without meaning to, because I was speaking of a future where Nicholas was King and I was his Luna.

He didn't seem put off by it, however. Instead, he seemed thoughtful. "That may be so," he said, "But it will always be my duty to keep my family safe. As a man, as a mate, and as a King."

His words left me speechless.

"Nicholas," I said after a moment to recover. I touched his arm, stopping him. He turned to look at me. I didn't know how to say what I wanted to say. There were so many levels of feeling within my heart, so many conversations we needed to have, if we were both thinking about a future together.

But such an idea, such a feeling, was so overwhelming, it seemed too large a subject to tackle right here on the way to meeting Julian and others.

But we needed to talk about this. Sooner rather than later.

"I know," he replied, as if he could read my thoughts. Perhaps it was truly my heart that he could read. He laced our fingers together and squeezed my hand.

God, if I could stay in that hallway with him and live in this moment forever, I would.

But, we were to meet the others soon. This conversation would have to wait until later, at the very least.

"I will bring you back here safely," Nicholas said. "Not just for Elva, but also for me. Then... perhaps a conversation is overdue."

I nodded. Though, before I could speak to Nicholas about this, I needed to have a conversation with his father, the King. That man would understand that I was not going away quietly.

That Nicholas was mine and I was going to fight until my dying breath to keep him, no matter what I had to do, what uncertain future I had to face.

But, unfortunately, now was neither the time for that.

"Let's go," I said to Nicholas, and tugged him by his hand toward the stair.

Before we could solve our love life, we had a war to stop.