Novel Square
22
“What’s the problem?” I mocked. “Have you lost your fucking mind?” I didn’t wait for him to respond before I continued, “If anything, I’ll take her out on a date, but our second time together isn’t going to be a family gathering with my daughter.”
“You’re wasting time, Ford.” He glanced at Everly and then back to me. “When I suggested inviting that girl over, it wasn’t just for your benefit, but for Eve’s too. I’m looking out for the both of you.”
“And the best thing for us is Sydney?” I tested.
He finished his Bloody Mary just as Craig brought us another round, and he took a bite of the celery, swallowing before he said, “What are you afraid of? Things not working out?”
My hands began to shake as my memory brought me back to a day I didn’t like to revisit. “What would I tell her then? Another woman had left her life?” I took a long drink. “Do you think that’s easy for me?”
“You can’t compare the two situations.”
“But I can.” I took a deep breath. “And I will.”
Anger pulsed through my chest.
Jenner didn’t get it.
Neither did Dominick.
They could love Everly endlessly, they could put her first, they could protect her with their lives, but they didn’t carry my pain. They also wouldn’t have to live with the guilt of intentionally bringing someone around Everly and dealing with the ramifications when the relationship didn’t work out.Content is © by NôvelDrama.Org.
The questions.
The sadness.
No one was ever going to hurt my daughter again-at least, not if I could help it.
And in this situation, I had all the power.
“You can’t compare every woman who comes into her life to your baby mama-”
“Jenner,” I practically fucking growled, “we don’t talk about her, especially not near Everly. Ever.” I handed him my cocktail, knowing I needed something much stiffer, and I announced to the group, “I’m going to go grab a drink. I’ll be back.”
I stopped at the bar in my man cave and poured myself some whiskey. Rather than rejoining my family, I went outside onto the patio and walked to the edge of the pool deck, taking in the view that overlooked the Hills.
I knew Jenner hadn’t intentionally pissed me off, but Rebecca was a topic I didn’t discuss.
Listening to the boys push me about women was a hard fucking limit for me.
They acted as though I didn’t want one in my life.
As though I wanted to be single forever.
That wasn’t the case.
I just wouldn’t put myself first.
Those days were long over.
The vibration in my pocket pulled me from my thoughts. I took out my phone, and my assistant’s name was on the screen.
I held it up to my ear and said, “Morning. I hope you have good news for me.”
“I have three interviews lined up. All of the nannies look extremely impressive on paper. Each not only met my criteria, but exceeded it as well.”
“Excellent.”
“If I’m as pleased with them in person, I’ll set up a time for you to interview them. Would you like that to take place at the office or at home so they’re able to interact with Everly?”
“We’ll start at the office. If I like what I see, I’ll have them meet my girl.”
“No problem.” She paused. “You know, I was reviewing your schedule this morning, and I saw that you have a weeklong work trip at the end of the month. Your parents are going to be in New York. I just want to make sure you’ve booked someone else to stay with her. Hannah perhaps?”
As I held on to the gate that surrounded the edge of my property, my head dropped, and I filled my lungs with air.
I’d known about my parents’ trip because I’d already asked them to watch Eve. I was hoping Hannah could fill in, my brothers alternating nights if they had to, but those questions were something I’d been avoiding.
Even though they loved spending time with my daughter, they had their own lives, and I fucking hated putting my responsibility on them.
“I don’t know what I’m going to do with her,” I admitted.
“Well, this will be a great time for the nanny to start, then. This’ll give her a few weeks to get acclimated before she’s completely on her own with Everly.”
“A week alone with my daughter? That sounds like a big step.”
“For you, Ford. I assure you, these girls-at least on paper, like I said-can most definitely handle it.”
My assistant had been with me since the beginning of my career.
She knew the circumstances and how protective I was. And in many ways, she helped guide me. Having three children of her own, all in their twenties, she’d been through this before.
I trusted her navigation skills.
I just couldn’t ask her to babysit. I had to draw the line somewhere.
“Ughhh,” I groaned. “I just don’t know.”
“Let’s not stress about this now. Let’s first see how the interviews go. I’m positive one of the nannies is going to be perfect for you and little Everly. If my assumption is correct, then things will be just fine, Ford.”
She was right.
Hell, if I was being honest, she was always right.
“I like that plan,” I replied.
I thanked her, and we hung up.
Before I put my phone away, I scanned the messages and notifications that had come in over the last few hours.
Not a single one was from Sydney.
Why did that feel like a letdown?
Is Jenner right? Am I wasting time?
Fuck.
Not only was she owning my goddamn thoughts, but now, I was questioning our conversation from earlier and whether I had been warm enough.
Did it matter?
Not if things were going to end there.
But if I was going to follow through with more, then I needed to text her again.